Don reads an article about The Nation redacting and apologizing for a poem they printed which starts out a rambling conversation centered on whether offense is pain, whether Hamilton is problematic, and how Mike Tyson’s 90’s video game was incredibly diverse.

Plus six things for you to do because the screen has boot your brain and you seem to need two assholes in Chicago to spice up your vapid life.

Today, David and Don tackle the shadow of anxiety recently defined as Trump Anxiety Syndrome. Dancing around the idea that therapy is either necessary (David) or quackery (Don) both agree that allowing a jackass in the White House cause you to cower in fear or depression is a completely avoidable thing.

And, because your life is filled with so much time to stare at your screen and fill your craven heart with dread due to the non-stop headlines about our Commander-in-Quife, the guys suggest six things more productive.

Whether shopping for sex, a babysitter (uhm...nanny), or setting up crazy friends with one another to watch the fireworks, the GentleApes of the ApeCast are still always scheming to make a buck.

Plus a few things to do before we all hafta mimic Patrick Swayze in "Red Dawn" because, motherfucker, the Russians are on their way to take over that new Target on Division!

D&D get into the concepts of death, where you (might) go after and how to manage the unknown future of Harry with the Grim Reaper sort of following him around.

Plus six things to do that assists you in understanding the world outside of your uncle's crawl space where you hide from aliens and your handsy older brother.

Beginning with a discussion of why Don may or may not want the Left to arm itself, the conversation turns to how we might wage an American Civil War without killing each other.

Plus six things to do because Yelp! sucks ass.

The chimps in a living room discuss David’s reunion with the parents of an ex-girlfriend at a wedding this weekend and his desire to make sure they relate how amazing his life is now to his ex. They also reveal the podcast’s only Apple Podcast review and David provides a response.

Plus, six tasks for you, the unwashed listener, to occupy your time so can avoid thinking about the emptiness of the daily plummet toward your own demise because you can no longer watch Roseanne for distraction.

The Apes in Charge talk at length about two completely disparate ideas — revenge and birthdays (PS: David is really, fully middle-aged now) and, as usual, come up with few conclusions but many opinions.

Plus six tasks for listeners that allow them to marinate in the nostalgia of the eighties as a way to avoid contemplating their own meaningless deaths.

On today’s episode, the Chimps in Charge discuss at length the problem with the friendly squatter, that person who needs a place to crash and never leave.

Plus they provide six things for you to do, watch, listen to or read for the week to fill your time so you don’t realize that nature wants you dead because your decaying flesh feeds the plants.

David brings up the big question: does today’s film and television circle jerk with nostalgia (Fuller House, Stranger Things, the new Roseanne) inhibit the impulse to create new ideas? Be warned: lots of nostalgia is present in the episode including Planet of the Apes, Will & Grace, and The Avengers. We also discover David’s unreasoning hatred for Joseph Gordon Levitt.

And, as always, the boys provide six tasks for you to fulfill your Eagle Scout badge requirements because you can’t start a fire for shit…