By David Himmel

• I can’t take anything serious you say seriously if you read the Huffington Post.

• If you read Literate Ape and still read Huffington Post, I’ll take half of what you seriously say serious.

• The biggest problem I’ve faced this week is reconciling my desire to move back to Las Vegas. You see, with Hall and Jerman making the move out there, and so many of my nearest and dearest still holding down the dust since my departure 11 years ago, and my ever-growing hatred of endless gray skies and cold air, I’m feeling a strong pull back west. However, while the warmth of the sun and friends are in Las Vegas, my boat is in Chicago.

• An email I just received from my father: “If your wife is my daughter-in-law, and you are my son, are you now married to your sister?”

• Actual advice I shouldn’t have given to a woman who is 34 weeks pregnant: “Just remember to take care of yourself, too. You’re still your own person. Your baby doesn’t need you to give him everything. He’ll be fine without you. Treat yourself.”

• I am 100 percent certain that those who cannot recognize progressive actions at the hands of the oft opposing party, even when it benefits the whole Union, will be left behind in the dust once this extreme bipartisanship nonsense goes the way of the dodo. These extremists, many of them rage profiteers, will spend their remaining days perceived as deranged loons you no longer invite to family dinners. And rightfully so.