By David Himmel

• I used to believe that the mantra “Happy wife, happy life” was beta male, spineless, bossy-feminism bullshit. I still think that, but I also subscribe to it. In your home life, the path of least resistance is the chosen path of the wise. Just give up. Nothing is worth her wrath — even the wrath of the sweetest ones, like my wife.

• Avoidance is also a great tool to use when constructing your happy life.

• Save your energy for your art and raising your children to be kind, but funny people.

 • Going to the movies alone is really the best way to go to the movies. However, after attending a late-night screening of Avengers Endgame Thursday night, I wanted nothing more than to have Patrick Brown, Brian Sweeney, and Don Hall next to me so we could wipe each other’s tears and sort through all of our geek emotions. Instead, I went home, fell asleep next to my wife who has little to no interest in these films, comic books, or characters, and my dog who doesn’t even know how to shit outside yet to dream of Elizabeth Olsen’s cleavage.

• There is no such thing as the perfect mate. Just the same, there’s no such thing as the perfect candidate. Pete Buttigieg might have one or two things you disagree with. Don’t write him off because of that. Maybe write him a letter instead. Joe Biden might hug too much and was a complete monster to Anita Hill in 1991. But he’s still not nearly as flawed as 2016 Hillary Clinton was. Besides, you shouldn’t have given Biden so much credit between 2008 and 2016. You know, because of the whole Anita Hill thing. Anyway… No one is perfect. Especially a candidate for President of the United States.

• Like many, I’d love to have more time in the day. But I pause on having access and ability to time travel. Considering all we know about the rules and risks associated with manipulating time, it seems like doing so while sticking to the rules and avoiding the risks would cost me more time than I’d possibly gain.