By David Himmel

• I think Trump’s second term will be better than his first.

• Walked past the nice homeless guy who hangs around outside my 7-11. He said, “Hey, man! I love your dog, you know!” I said, “Hey, buddy! How’re you doing?” He said, “I’m proud to be American!” And that right there… There is no greater exchange to exemplify how terribly mental illness impacts the homeless community.

• I had a dream that I owned the complete 1980s Voltron toy. And that when our apartment caught fire, it was one of the things I made sure to save. I wonder what that says about how I view myself. Voltron is the Defender of the Universe, and yet, in my dreams, Voltron needs me to save it.

• As a husband, father, and dog owner, here’s what I’ve learned: Never trust your family and never take anything personally. No one loves you unless you take them outside to poop or look for trucks.

• The only way to get those Sesame Street earworm songs out of your head is to put into your head another equally obnoxious earworm such as “It’s a Small World” Or, better yet, put a bullet in your head. That’s not just a treatment, it’s the cure.

• The heroes of this pandemic are not those who protest in front of government buildings with assault rifles strapped to their chests, but you, the fattening slob in sweatpants farting on your couch while watching 30 Rock on Hulu.