LITERATE APE

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Let Them Eat Really Expensive Popcorn (and maybe some cake)

by Don Hall

AMC Theatres will begin setting their ticket prices according to where patrons choose to sit in the auditorium, under its Sightline initiative, the company announced Monday.

Seats on the front row are considered Value Sightline seats and cost less, while seats in the middle are called Preferred Sightline and will cost more. The remaining parts of the theater are Standard Sightline seats and will cost the price of a standard admission ticket.

https://apple.news/AlAL99no5QVC-TwObXSQwWg

This is a perception problem more than an actual problem. Similar to the Netflix leaked threat to crackdown on password sharing or those FBI warnings that used to begin every VHS and DVD. Even more like when a young mom tells her child to behave “…or else.” Or else what?

Dedicated movie-goers already endure the ridiculous prices of concessions so an extra couple bucks to sit in the middle isn’t going to stop them from opting in. Casual movie-goers—those perfectly fine waiting the extra month or so until it pops up on some streaming service—aren’t really going to the theater post-COVID anyway. The difficulty, if there is any, is what are theaters going to do if someone pays for the shitty seats up front but sits in the middle anyway?

If videos of people refusing to wear masks on planes or losing their shit at fast food restaurants is any indication, AMC is going to have to hire security and more ushers who aren’t still in high school to mitigate the customer melees over seats.

AMC: “You better sit in your assigned and paid for seat or else!”

PATRON: “…or else what?”

Pragmatically, the theaters are screwed. Without constantly interrupting the thirty minutes of Maria Menounos, her Noovie time-filler, ads for shit I don’t want, and previews—not to mention the first ten minutes of the actual film—there will be no enforcement. Without enforcement, the new pricing structure means jackshit. Sort of like brutal cops killing people—no enforcement of the law and there may as well not be a law in the first place. Free for all, the innocents be damned.

This is a branding problem which is why Netflix leaked their plans to throttle password sharing, got wind of people getting really pissed about taking away something they now feel entitled to, and immediately reversed course. AMC now looks greedy and classist. Sure, they’re using the same pricing idea that live concerts use but Live Nation and TicketMaster are already the worst companies in terms of brand image, why ape them?

If AMC really wants to up the ticket price of already high-priced movie tickets, why not improve the experience?

I’d pay an extra buck if the movie started on time without Noovie or ads. I like the previews but not ten minutes of them. I’d pay an extra two bucks if the theater I went to barred parents from bringing their children unless it’s a G-Rated film. I’d pay an extra couple bucks if, in the multiplex of sixteen theaters, two of them were reserved for indie films and movies made on a shoestring budget. I am a Marvel fan but I really like seeing films like Tár and Aftersun in an actual theater.

But pay extra to get the good seats? Segregate the auditorium into sections based on available expendable income? Not. A. Good. Look. Don’t be surprised if AMC pulls a Netflix and claims they were only contemplating the idea and disregard the whole idea.

I’d still play extra to keep children as far away as possible.