By David Himmel

Everyone gets anxious. Sometimes it’s fun, like as you’re taking the field at the big game or before you head to Hawaii with your significant other of five years—“Will he finally propose!?” Sometimes, it works in our favor by keeping us from doing harmful things like snorting heroin or admitting we still like Woody Allen films. Most often, anxiety is associated with the bad. Because it can be crippling, paralyzing, even. Simply put, anxiety occurs from fear of the unknown.

Judging by the self-help bookshelves and popular Instagram stories, America’s anxiety cup runneth over. But in 2023, China and India out-anxioused the U.S. more than two fold. If that’s surprising, it’s because we’ve become accustomed to the cacophony of the squeaky wheel. But American Anxiety is a special case. We seem to not only see it as a problem, but also, a badge of honor.

The U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention says one in five American adults reported anxiety issues in 2022, about 18.2 percent of the population. The American Psychiatry Association reports that 43 percent of American adults are more anxious now than they were in 2023, a spike of 37 percent. The primary causes are the economy (77 percent), the 2024 election (73 percent), and gun violence (69 percent).

It’s understandable. For most of us, these issues are beyond our control. Yeah, we can vote, but that doesn’t guarantee we’ll get the outcome we want. Preventing gun violence is in the hands of way too many different institutions for any one of us to manage on a daily basis, and the economy? That game is run and rigged by the few and the wealthy. And MomTok influencers.

As America’s leading social critic and political commentator, I’m going to tell you something that won’t help your anxiety. You ready? Are you sitting down? Do you have your gummies? Has the Prozac kicked in? Okay, here we go…

Anxiety is the thing that’s ripped our country apart. It has divided us, caused us to fear and hate those who think and live differently than us, and even caused us to hate those who only slightly disagree with us. It has led to panic and overreaction. And I worry that American Anxiety is only going to exacerbate the social and political divide in this country to the point that there is no coming back. And yes, that’s my anxiety talking. If I let my pragmatism get a word in, it would tell me that’s probably a good thing. America had a good run. It’s time for this empire to fall. Burn the rubble, let the wind take the ashes. Actually, that sounds like melodrama. Pragmatism would say, “Relax. Take a breath. Think. The future is unknown.”

Yes, the future is unknown. But we can forecast based on what we absolutely do know. If President-elect Trump and his MAGAites get their way, our country as we know it may cease to exist. The threat of prosecuting his enemies, mass deportations, a tariff war that’ll hurt all of us at the checkout line, the gutting of the remaining checks and balances by enacting Schedule F through an executive order… The list of obvious warning signs and concerns of a slaughtered democracy goes on.

 You don’t get to just decide what’s real and what’s not. Or, if that’s how you want to play it, then you should have no issue with your Gen Z co-worker identifying as a hairless cat.

The minority of us Americans whose candidate lost the election are rightfully anxious. Everyone knows Trump’s foibles. Clearly, most Americans don’t care. They don’t care that he was found liable for sexual assault in a court of law, that he’s a habitual liar, that he’s a terrible businessman, an insurrectionist, and a wannabe dictator, if only for a day. Those who voted for him will say, “But the insurrection didn’t work.” Okay, so, what, we just get rid of attempted murder because crimes only matter if you complete the assignment? Trump has told us what he wants to do. He’s used dehumanizing language that is ripped straight from the speeches of history’s most reviled dictators and autocrats. “Oh, it’s just hyperbole,” they’ve said. “You can’t take the guy seriously.” Why not? He was the President of the United States. Then he was running to be president. And now he’s president-elect. That means something. You don’t get to just decide what’s real and what’s not. Or, if that’s how you want to play it, then you should have no issue with your Gen Z co-worker identifying as a hairless cat.

When we look at a mass shooter, we dig up their past and see all the writing on the wall. And we say, “Why didn’t someone stop them? Why didn’t their parents or teachers or the police or social workers step in and stop him? Why didn’t the background check flag this dude with a big, fat, red-inked ‘NO’? We should have taken him at his word. He told us what he was going to do.” The same approach applies for Trump.

Splitting up what he says into the hyperbolic and the true based on what’s comfortable, is just twisting the truth into your truth, and anyone’s truth is not true it all. It’s opinion. It’s the mind games we play with ourselves to make things easier on ourselves. Justification for bad actions.

Maybe people voted for Trump because they did, actually, believe his threats of violence and disorder if he lost again. Maybe they figured, if he won, he’d be happy, calm down, and not be that dictator on Day 1. It’s a big country. There are a lot of reasons to side with anything. Voting to avoid a childlike tantrum, but with guns, is not one of them.

I think the majority of this country who voted overwhelmingly for Trump will soon see how little he’ll do for all of us—them included. Will they learn? Probably not. Just like the Democratic Party won’t learn from its mistakes in campaigning, policy, and messaging. We are not a country that is capable of learning from its mistakes because of one simple thing: Our bloated American Hubris.

Hubris that America can do no wrong, despite overwhelming evidence against it. Hubris that our systems of checks and balances will not fail when history is full of examples where stronger, larger, longer-lasting empires have crumbled under their own weight of mismanagement and ego. Hubris that we, as individuals can’t be wrong because it’s always the Other that put us in that position.

It doesn’t have to be like this. It would behoove us all to calm down and sit quietly for a moment to reflect on our own actions, the actions of others in our lives, the actions of this country. Consider history. Consider that no one is always the hero or always the villain. Recognize that we’re not always going to win, nor are we always going to lose—so long as we adapt our approach. That adaptation comes from getting out of our own heads, pushing through our wall of anxiety like the KOOL-Aid Man. To listen to understand and speak to be heard. That is to say, take your bias and bury it, and let kindness lead your words and tone. Scolding someone as a means to win them to your side has never worked. It’s polarizing. It pushes the scolded away from you. This has been a big failure of the Left for the last eight years at least, and we saw that play out at the polls. Not burying the bias will likely prove to be the greatest failing of the Right. Their unnecessary fear of social progress and true freedom will only drive them further and further from where America functions best—somewhere in the middle. And, frankly, that goes for the Left as well.

Bias and scolding are reactions to hubris and anxiety. Unnecessary self-preservation and panic. America is in desperate need of stoicism if it is to survive itself. And We the People must embrace the virtues of stoicism if we are to survive each other. No one can be perfectly stoic all the time, of course. But if wisdom, self-control, justice, and bravery can hold court in our minds to the degree with which we’ve let hubris and anxiety occupy that space, then hubris and anxiety will find themselves ushered from first class to steerage.

America needs bravery more than anything right now. Bravery is not taking to social media to air your grievances nor is it waxing activist among your close circle of friends at the indie bookstore. Bravery is having the tough discussions with those who may have differing opinions. Bravery is not marching with tiki torches chanting “They will not replace us” or beating up a cop on your way into the Capitol. Bravery is recognizing that you’re not the chosen one and that there’s plenty of room for all of us.

Make no mistake, alarm is allowed. Bad things happen. But even when the alarm sounds, we must maintain stoicism. No one wants a firefighter to have an anxiety attack when they need to run into the burning building. That firefighter has to keep their wits about them. Furthermore, you don’t want your firefighter to have such hubris that they don’t act with urgency. “Eh, the fire is only three blocks away, lemme finish my sandwich first.”

Trump won. By a lot. And in a way few expected. His win is less about his prowess and more about the failings of the Left. His gains in urban areas, long trusted as Democratic strongholds should be alarming. As a result, bad things happening seems to be taking shape as Trump readies his second stab at running the country. His cabinet picks thus far have consisted of undeniable quacks, sycophants, and alleged criminals.

But we mustn’t panic. And we can’t expect that everything’s going to be fine. We have to be prepared. Prepared to listen, prepared to try a new approach, prepared to consider that despite the feelings of anger and hatred, most of us want to live in a peaceful, prosperous country. Not Trump. He likes his violence and prefers to keep his prosperity to himself and his rich acolytes.

The majority of America is feeling pretty good right now. I don’t think that’ll last. And that will be their lesson. For the rest of us, we can be angry, sad, and scared. But to beat back the threat we see so plainly, we cannot let our anger, sadness, and fear dictate our actions. We cannot allow hubris and anxiety to continue driving us. We have to admit our failings, shut up and listen to the majority of America, and through that discovery, figure out a path to preserving the Union and ensuring equitable opportunity, prosperity, and safety for all Americans.

Yeah, even the assholes. That’s the price of democracy.