By David Himmel

• The New York Times needs to go. Not because its level of journalism has declined, but because it kicked me out of my account. I had to re-login and because of that, for some reason, my Wordle stats are gone. Unacceptable.

• Remember that really bad pimple right in the middle of the bridge of your nose? The big one. The huge one. The one that wouldn’t pop but you kept picking at it anyway. And it eventually just became a massive, lumpy scab? The one that looked like a third eye? Remember how you were sure it would never go away? Then it did. That’s life, man. This ugly, painful thing, too shall pass. But, that ass pimple that feels four inches below the surface yet like it’s always ready to burst? That’s bastard ain’t going anywhere.

• Going through two consecutive green lights without having to even take your foot off the gas during morning rush hour (and while slightly speeding) is evidence that the gods sometimes love you.

• There is a unique fear that comes with the excitement of flying across the country with two young kids and your mother. It’s a fear I’m devouring right this moment, and it’s delicious.

• Waking up early to write or workout is the greatest way to start the day. Unless your bedroom is invaded by a 1-and-a-half-year-old at 5:30 a.m. to snuggle with you. That’s the greatest way to start the day.

• Being a hitman could be my dream job. Problem is, I need a good benefits plan. I’m a family man after all.