By David Himmel

• I was at the post office the other day shipping out a few special ordered copies of The Last DJ. The woman helping me, who seemed to be a manager, asks, “Are these books?”
“Yes.”
“Like, reading books? Books you read?”
“Yes, they’re books for reading. I don’t understand the question.”
“If they’re books just for reading, you can send them at the Media Rate. It’s cheaper.”
“Let’s do the Media Rate.”
I was grateful for her saving me a few bucks—because I always forget about the Media Rate—but I have to wonder what her life experiences were that made it seem like she’s not quite clear on how a book functions. Even a picture book is read. What a fantastic species we are.

• Only a crazy person would admit to being crazy.

• A struggling business posting to social media with a list of reasons they’re broke and the hardships they’re facing then asking you to come buy their stuff is the same as someone setting up a GoFundMe to cover the cost of their eat, pray, love adventure. If the business is struggling, try a different marketing approach. But don’t beg. Begging always has a shitty ROI.

• Managing our expectations of others is the most humane thing we can do for one another.

• The best part about Fall is those grossly damp, boiling hot days that sneak in between the cooler ones. Summer’s death rattle.

• Big Tobacco is still winning the war. Cigarettes are the cheapest thing at the grocery store and they suppress your appetite. Think about it. Big Tobacco has taken over Big Grocery. And Bush totally did 9/11.