Checklist for the World’s End

By David Himmel

◻ Cargo shorts

◻ Maglite

◻ Carl Buddig meats

◻ Water bottles

◻ SodaStream

◻ Photos of your family

◻ Batteries for the Maglite

◻ Sweatshirt

◻ Latest issue of The Paris Review

◻ Photos of your ex

◻ Chapstick

◻ Sunscreen

◻ Annie Hall on DVD

◻ DVD player

◻ Batteries for the DVD player

◻ Photos of your ex with their kids

◻ High quality manual pencil sharpener

◻ The good scotch

◻ Stationary to write an apology letter to North Korea

◻ .22 rifle

◻ Ammunition for the .22 rifle

◻ Your really liberal friend who hates white men

◻ Your really conservative friend who hates Hillary Clinton

◻ Black tea

◻ Black people

◻ Protest sign from the Women’s March in Washington/toilet paper

◻ iPhone charger

◻ iPhone

◻ Detailed list of your logins and passwords

◻ Poop bags

◻ Contact lens solution

◻ Tide To Go pen

◻ Photos of your spouse

◻ 1995 Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue

◻ Some version of R.E.M.’s It’s the End of the World as We Know It

◻ Life insurance policy

◻ A map of where in space you’d like your essence to be scattered