The Music of Obscenity
Favorites include "douchebag," "asshat," "shit stain," and, of course, any variation on the word "fuck." The Irish can use these words like Yo Yo Ma can play an arpeggio and I consider myself a near virtuoso.
Too Much Fun
Passed out early this morning
with a stranger's (new friend's?)
cum on my face,
after drinking too much whiskey,
talking too much,
staying out until
the wee hours of the morning.
Don't Give Me a Hard Time About Condoms and Other Pickup One-Night Stand Caveats
There are certain things you shouldn't do without asking first or negotiating beforehand. And you shouldn't get all pissy if you're denied. These include, but are not limited to, the following:
- pissing on my face
- ass to vagina or ass to mouth
- verbal abuse (Though the usual dirty talk is okay and even preferred)
- anything that breaks or significantly marks the skin (Although, I get a kick out of having to cover hickeys with concealer before I go to work the next day. Makes me feel like a teenager.)
Christmas is a time for giving, being with family and friends, and hating every other asshole out there in the shops and on the roads also trying to spread joy and share in the Christmas spirit. Similarly, Hanukkah is a time for Jewish people to desperately try to feel relevant during Christmastime.