Don Hall 12/4/17 Don Hall 12/4/17

I Believe... [Russiagate is a Smokescreen]

...that the need for self-expression combined with the faulty promise of access to the megaphone of social media has created a reward for disingenuous posturing and boasting of virtues best left felt rather than heard. Watching Matt Lauer do a PSA against sexual harassment is just a national example of doughy guys on Faceborg signaling their sad complicity and sorrow for having cocks.

Don Hall 11/27/17 Don Hall 11/27/17

I Believe... [Will SOME Mega-Corporations PLEASE Regulate the Internet?]

...that there is a paradox afoot when we are trying hard to get a few mega-corporations to regulate content on the internet (Faceborg, Google) and trying hard to prevent other mega-corporations from regulating content on the internet (Comcast, ATT&T) at the same time.

Don Hall 11/20/17 Don Hall 11/20/17

I Believe... [We Are Poised to Lose 2020]

...that the Progressive slogan for Election 2020 is now officially "Cutting Off Our Noses to Spite Our Faces."

Don Hall 11/13/17 Don Hall 11/13/17

I Believe...[Outing Spacey Doesn't Erase the ShitShow That Was "Rent"]

...that, if you're going to carry around a palm-sized supercomputer that cost you a grand and is made almost entirely of in your back pocket, you probably shouldn't treat it like a disposable burner phone. The computing power to send NASA to the moon should not be so carelessly stashed that close to your bunghole, bro.

Don Hall 11/6/17 Don Hall 11/6/17

I Believe... [Joking About "David Cop-a-Feel" is NOT Rapey]

Don Hall 10/30/17 Don Hall 10/30/17

I Believe... [The Monsters Are Us]

...that if aliens came to Earth with any mission but total annihilation of the human race, 2017 would convince them otherwise.

Don Hall 10/23/17 Don Hall 10/23/17

I Believe... [George W. is Enjoying the Trumpster Fire]

...that, if nothing else, at least the ineffectual pile of runny dogshit that is the Donald Trump presidency has managed to rehabilitate the image of poor, dimwitted George W.

Don Hall 10/16/17 Don Hall 10/16/17

I Believe... [Shifting Demographics]

...that when piranha smell blood in the water, even paper cuts will doom you.

Don Hall 10/9/17 Don Hall 10/9/17

I Believe... [AIM Wasn't Dead and Buried?]

...that it is almost embarrassing when it is announced that someone or something died and you thought they or it was dead long ago. That said, if you were still using AOL Instant Messenger, you're the one idiot using an abacus in the middle of an Apple store.

Don Hall 10/2/17 Don Hall 10/2/17

I Believe... [I Heard a Rumor...]

...that if your allegiance is to a symbol rather than people, to a song rather than citizens, you *might* be a racist or you *might* not be a racist but you are definitely a jackass.

Don Hall 9/25/17 Don Hall 9/25/17

I Believe... [Nazis are the White People of Germans?]

...that when the shit hits the fan, focusing on all the shit flying everywhere is the wrong choice. Deal with the fan.

Don Hall 9/18/17 Don Hall 9/18/17

I Believe... [Monolithic Propaganda is a Waste of Time]

...that every bigot believes their prejudice is justified and that a hostile work environment is defined by the one the hostility is directed at.

Don Hall 9/11/17 Don Hall 9/11/17

I Believe... [Traipsing Through London]

...that London is what New York will be 200 years from now—the City That Used to Be the Center of the World But No Longer.

Don Hall 9/4/17 Don Hall 9/4/17

I Believe... [Is Taylor Swift Our Nero?]

...that, in light of how screwed we are in the world with nature finally fighting back and flooding coastal cities in epic fashion, maybe the trials of being Taylor Swift aren't that fucking important. Methinks she may be Nero fiddling as Rome burns...

Don Hall 8/28/17 Don Hall 8/28/17

I Believe... [Uniting Against a Common Enemy]

...that in the dystopian Aliens Attack the Earth books and films, mankind comes together against a common enemy that transcends nationality, race, class and religion. If our global response to Trump is any indication of how we actually respond to a World Class Threat, the aliens are gonna kick our infighting asses.

Don Hall 8/21/17 Don Hall 8/21/17

I Believe... [And Danny Rand Became Less Annoying]

...that in the "Look on the bright side of things" Pollyanna sort of way, at least it's becoming easier to spot the bigots, right?

Don Hall 8/14/17 Don Hall 8/14/17

I Believe... [Fearless Leaders Masturbating Each Other with Nuke Threats]

...that "reverse racism" isn't racism at all but a simple adjustment to even things up a little bit. In the parlance of civilized people, we tend to call that a long overdue slice of justice.

Don Hall 8/7/17 Don Hall 8/7/17

I Believe... [Scaramucci Even Sounds Like a Death Eater]

Don Hall 7/31/17 Don Hall 7/31/17

I Believe... [Dating Advice from John Hughes is BAD]

Don Hall 7/24/17 Don Hall 7/24/17

I Believe...[Dog Sauce, My Ass]

...that Chicago Dog Sauce is both a terrible name for ketchup and the strangest ploy to get Chicago hot dog purists (which is like old lady Hummel figurine collectors and dudes who collect sports tattoos in the precious category) to use a condiment in history. They could’ve called it “Ketchup for Morons” and it would’ve been more honest.