I Believe... [Binary Choices]

...that if your pronouns aren’t actual pronouns then you can’t call them pronouns. Gender choice is fine but it doesn’t entitle you to redefine basic grammar. Or you can and I’ll regard you in the same way I regard a guy who thinks that Klingon is a real language.

...that I may be thrice-divorced but I’m really doubling down on my mustache and candle games around here.

...that the internet operates on a binary set of numbers, 1’s and 0’s. Humanity operates with far more complexity. As the internet continues to evolve into humanity’s primary means of communication, we can’t help but begin to see the world in binary terms.

...that if you are offended on the behalf of someone else yet perform as if you are personally offended, you’re a boob.

...that best part of thought police is that they don’t carry guns or have any authority whatsoever. They’re like those nosey fuckers who video you if you don’t put your shopping cart back.