The Minutes of Our Last Meeting – The Animal Coalition at Cubby Wadsworth’s Drive-Thru Zoo

Giraffes_at_west_midlands_safari_park.jpg

By Joe Janes

The Animal Coalition

at Cubby Wadsworth’s Drive-Thru Zoo

 

In attendance: three elephants, two lions, a rhinoceros,

a camel, four giraffes, a zebra and, for some reason, a goat

 

Watering Hole Three,

When Head of Fire God Peeks Over the High Fence O’Clock

-       We met to finalize our plans for escaping the drive-thru zoo. We have had enough of people watching us, feeding us candy, and making us tired from their exhaust fumes. Today is the day.

-       The elephants know how to drive as long as it is not a stick. They have been observing the humans in their small containers.

-       If there is a roof opening, the lions will peel back the top like the tab on a plastic holder of yogurt. The type sold at the concession stand. And remove the humans from their containers to use for food on the trip.

-       The rhino has heard that many humans want to kill him for his nose, which we are all confused about. He wants to stay and he is welcome to. He did say he will happily ram any containers that try to follow us.

-       Two elephants will sit in the front. The giraffes will sit in the back.

-       We will need a second containment box with wheels. This will be for the lions, the camel, and the zebra. The third elephant will drive. The zebra will have to sit in the back on the hump. The camel’s hump.

-       The goat is staying. Being a goat here is probably about the same or better than being a goat anywhere else. The goat did not need to be at the meeting, but did bring snacks, which is nice.

-       If we get separated, we are to drive to Africa and meet there.

 

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