![I Believe… [Christmas 2019]](https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/579fa3912994ca0eff850271/1576785064615-50G7BVP5OA3KTDK1HFRS/IMG_2569.jpeg)
I Believe… [Christmas 2019]
I believe… that the older you get, the less you want (unless it’s pharmaceuticals and sleep and then you want it all). Do your AARP family member a solid and gift them generic drugs from Canada and room for a lot of naps this holiday season.
![I Believe... [Advertisers Should Die Uncomfortably]](https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/579fa3912994ca0eff850271/1545923119095-53ZUB4WH642Q44FKLYWP/63D3D89E-A10F-476D-AACA-F8F058399C12.JPG)
I Believe... [Advertisers Should Die Uncomfortably]
..that after spending a week plus in Kansas, I can say that the worst thing about this country and the lives of a vast swath of its citizens is having to endure television advertising. Fucking Geico commercials can destroy even Godfather Part II. It’s like having an annoying 14-year old keep interrupting your show every fifteen minutes to poke you in the chest repeatedly, make armpit farts, and twerk to mouth-made beats. For three fucking hours.
![I Believe… [Christmas Day 2017]](https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/579fa3912994ca0eff850271/1513445083784-O7PB4HGMUVLU2FEMSQ3K/yorick2.jpg)
I Believe… [Christmas Day 2017]
…that Christmas makes me realize how fragile we all are and how brilliantly heroic it is to simply survive on a ball of rock hurtling through space. We thrive in spite of our natures and the yin-yang of the best and worst parts of us is what makes humanity remarkable.
Anxiety is the thing that’s ripped our country apart. It has divided us, caused us to fear and hate those who think and live differently than us, and even caused us to hate those who only slightly disagree with us. It has led to panic and overreaction. And I worry that American Anxiety is only going to exacerbate the social and political divide in this country to the point that there is no coming back.