The Minutes of Our Last Meeting – The Historic Greatest Really Huge Better Than Obama Deal Of The Century Everyone Says So Where’s My Nobel Peace Prize You’re Welcome Trump/Jong-un Summit
Phil the Translator: Anything for you, President Trump. Our glorious dictator appreciates you treating him like an equal. You know he has killed people, right? A general who fell asleep during a meeting. Even members of his own family who didn’t agree with him.
In The Northern Liberated Provinces of Korea
Wu Ran-sang heard himself sigh. In this sigh, there were many feelings.
His heart and body hung between the sky and the dun ground along the northwest wall of the tallest building in Onsong. Nine stories. A recovered textile factory in the process of retrofit.
Ran-sang, an electrician of a singular talent, looked out at the view which the height afforded him. A warm mid-spring sun hung in a wide open sky of astonishing blue. The diamond pearls of the Tumen River glistened in their long band not too far off. This was now the Sapphire Coast and Onsong was in preparation to be a modest city of great culture and assimilation.
Notes from the Post-it Wall — Week of August 6, 2017
• I think that the best thing for all of us—this global community—is a nuclear war. It’ll remind us—those of us who are left—how devastating the nuclear option is. It’s been too long since anyone witnessed the destruction the Bomb wields and as a result, we’ve become desensitized to it, which is exactly why the two chubby children think it’s fun to throw threats of a fiery endgame around. So yeah, bring down the fury of hot hell. Maybe it’ll knock some sense into us. Bonus: I won’t have to worry about paying my quarterly taxes next time around.
Christmas is a time for giving, being with family and friends, and hating every other asshole out there in the shops and on the roads also trying to spread joy and share in the Christmas spirit. Similarly, Hanukkah is a time for Jewish people to desperately try to feel relevant during Christmastime.