Notes from the Post-it Wall | Week of June 2, 2019
• McSweeney’s is to comedy what Christopher Cross is to rock ‘n’ roll.
• Does Elmo go to school? Because I wouldn’t mind seeing that little red monster take a bullet in a school shooting.
• One redeeming quality of divorcing with children is that it removes the need to fight over which parent does what and how much. If your ex-spouse ever says, “I do everything,” you can simply reply with, “Blame your attorney. That’s the deal she cut.”
• I start training for the Chicago Marathon tomorrow. So, these are my final hours with working knees, hips, and shoulders.
• Himmel’s Life Hack #302: If you must complain about life, save it for your pal at the bar or your diary. Never complain about life to your significant other. Eighty percent of your complaints are their fault anyhow.
• Star Wars is forty-two years old. If we defended, preserved, protected, and treated our elderly as well as we defend, preserve, protect, and treat our films about lasers and robots our healthcare system would be the cream of the crop.
