The Minutes of Our Last Meeting | Reasons Not To Go To Your Small-Town High School Reunion
Only go if the inventor of Post-It Notes will be there.
Reasons Not To Go To
Your Small-Town High School Reunion
- You are appalled by and ashamed of the number of typos in the “invitashun”.
- Everyone’s brain stopped growing while their waist bands continued without them.
- You only like three of there.
- Too many of them never moved away.
- You listen to current music.
- Not everyone will wear a mask. Mainly because the pandemic should be over by next summer. If everyone wears a mask anyway, reconsider.
- You have a conflict on that date. A moral conflict.
- Your football team still has an offensive name and mascot.
- The school bullies are now cops. Can’t drive through the town without PTSD.
- You were told MAGA hats and guns were encouraged.
- Or you were informed not to wear a MAGA hat or side arm. Show up in your Donald Trump American flag onesie and several AR-15s strapped to your back, but only stay until you get kicked out. Have your phone ready.
- You died ten years ago and are now a ghost doomed to haunt the crappy studio apartment you died in.
Class of No Class