David Himmel 1/1/22 David Himmel 1/1/22

Y2K 2.0: One Man's Struggle with an Unforgiving Virus

Could I have used the watch as it was with its minor malfunctions? Yes. As a sport watch, sure. But Katie paid good money for KITT and I see nothing wrong with wanting new Christmas presents to work as intended. I also expect a lot from Apple products even if they do give me the heebie-jeebies. And they do. But not because I’m afraid of technology but because I carry the Y2K virus in my blood. I am a thriving host for this 21st Century strain of panic.

David Himmel 12/31/21 David Himmel 12/31/21

Notes from the Post-it Wall | Week of December 26, 2021

We all want to be new versions of ourselves with each New Year. But change is hard and it’s much easier to love the one you’re with. To tolerate the one you are.

David Himmel 12/25/21 David Himmel 12/25/21

Merry Christmas from the Afterlife

I can see them when I sneak out from the basement, walk to the front of the house and peek into the windows like a pervert, but I cannot participate in their life. I can hear them occasionally talking about me, but the longer I’m down here, the less I come up in conversation. In another few days, I expect to hear the voice of a man telling Katie he’ll love Harry like he was his own just before he moves his shit into my house.

David Himmel 12/24/21 David Himmel 12/24/21

Notes from the Post-it Wall | Christmas Eve, 2021

Santa Claus is as real as the fact that this time next year, covid won’t be a problem.

David Himmel 12/10/21 David Himmel 12/10/21

Notes from the Post-it Wall | Week of December 5, 2021

The first two minutes of And Just Like That, the Sex and the City spin-off, is worse than the entire day of Sept. 11, 2001.

David Himmel 12/3/21 David Himmel 12/3/21

Notes from the Post-it Wall | Week of November 28, 2021

Shredded parmesan cheese tastes better than grated parmesan cheese. Fight me.

David Himmel 11/19/21 David Himmel 11/19/21

Notes from the Post-it Wall | Week of November 14, 2021

In my opinion, pineapple can go on pizza. But the idea of drizzling gooey cheese on a piece of warm pineapple repulses me. I have been working through this complicated realization for a week now and the logic is not any closer to revealing itself.

David Himmel 11/12/21 David Himmel 11/12/21

Notes from the Post-it Wall | Week of November 7, 2021

You’re not getting your steps in, you’re going for a walk. Just the same as I’m not flexing my sphincter, I’m taking a shit.

David Himmel 11/5/21 David Himmel 11/5/21

Notes from the Post-it Wall | Week of October 31, 2021

Tattoos are bumper stickers for your skin. The difference is that tattoos are classy.

David Himmel 10/29/21 David Himmel 10/29/21

Notes from the Post-it Wall | Week of October 24, 2021

Being offended is a choice. Just like it’s a choice to live your unrealistic truth. It’s okay to live in a fantasy world of discomfort but why would you want to? And don’t be surprised if no one fun wants to join you there.

David Himmel 10/22/21 David Himmel 10/22/21

Notes from the Post-it Wall | Week of October 17, 2021

An unfinished manuscript can haunt you like a ghost. An unpublished book can devour your brain like a hungry zombie.

David Himmel 10/15/21 David Himmel 10/15/21

Notes from the Post-it Wall | Week of October 10, 2021

Has there ever been a king named Simon? Because that seems like a good name for a king since everyone must do what Simon says.

David Himmel 10/8/21 David Himmel 10/8/21

Notes from the Post-it Wall | Week of October 3, 2021

I’m not one to introduce holidays too early. Like, keep Halloween in October, thanksgiving in November, etc. but if the threat of texting Santa gets my kid to brush his teeth and get to bed without a fuss at any point in the year, I’m all for talking Christmas in March.

David Himmel 10/6/21 David Himmel 10/6/21

Why Keep Giving Facebook My Business?

I don’t know if I’ll leave it. But it’s been on my mind for a while now. Maybe I won’t go cold turkey, maybe I’ll start by deleting the app from my phone. Or maybe it’s best to pack up all my shit and walk right out. That’s the advice I’d give to someone else in an abusive relationship.

David Himmel 10/1/21 David Himmel 10/1/21

Notes from the Post-it Wall | Week of September 26, 2021

Beware: We are in the Nesting Season. The Season of Nostalgia. Embrace it or be consumed by your darkest depressions. And know that no amount of convincing yourself that Sweater Weather means anything other than the northern hemisphere is preparing to die for a few months.

David Himmel 9/24/21 David Himmel 9/24/21

Notes from the Post-it Wall | Week of September 19, 2021

Perhaps our obsession with missing and dead white girls is because they often go missing and are killed by white men and we just love looking at ourselves even at our worst. We’re self-obsessed. We are American Psychos.

David Himmel 9/17/21 David Himmel 9/17/21

Notes from the Post-it Wall | Week of September 12, 2021

I like to think that when our society crumbles and future humans or alien scavengers dig our civilization out of the dirt, they’ll look at the Met Gala and laugh at our absurd level of indulgence the way we look and laugh at ancient Rome.

David Himmel 9/10/21 David Himmel 9/10/21

Notes from the Post-it Wall | 5 Years Married Edition

Take nothing personal. Your spouse loves you more than most other people in the world. Be comfortable with that. They also hate you more than most people in the world. Be comfortable with that, too.

David Himmel 9/3/21 David Himmel 9/3/21

Notes from the Post-it Wall | Week of August 29, 2021

Cancel culture will fail us all. It’s an overcorrection to answer for the previous culture that failed us all.

David Himmel 9/1/21 David Himmel 9/1/21

Leaving Afghanistan Better Than We Found It was Never Possible

I’ve been thinking a lot about my friend Jordan lately. I haven’t seen her in a while and I would like to get together with her, her husband Tom—have them over to our new place, see the kid, drink some beer, have some laughs. But mostly, I’ve been thinking about Jordan because of a rule she lived by during her dating years.

“Always leave your ex better than you found them.”