The Minutes of our Last Meeting – GOP Emergency Meeting for an Action Plan to End Gun Violence
The most phallic thing Mitch McConnell has raised in decades.
GOP Emergency Meeting for an
Action Plan to End Gun Violence
February 21, 2018 9:00am
Present: House and Senate Republicans
Without discussion, Mitch McConnell ran down
the GOP's strategy.
- Moments of silence for a few more days
- Send thoughts and prayers via Twitter
- Condemn video games, pornography and abortion
- Keep perverts out of public bathrooms to show we do care about our kids
- Call to get all the facts before making a decision and then don’t get all the facts
- Seriously, abortion is just the worst, unless it’s a pregnant mistress
- Resist any knee jerk reactions that would restrict gun ownership
- Condemn democrats for wanting to take guns away from responsible gun owners, which everyone who owns a gun thinks they are
- Cast doubt on validity of shooting victims (what works for sexual harassment works here, too)
- Write up legislation, stall legislation, kill legislation
- Abortion. Am I right?
- We got our usual post-shooting spike in NRA contributions, cash those checks quickly!
- Hope Trump keeps tweeting outrageous bullshit and people forget about this gun stuff until the next one happens in a few weeks
Guns are for hunting and frolicking.