The Minutes of Our Last Meeting – Mueller Redacted
Please, take a look.
Dreaming of the Mueller Report
The following is a recounting of a dream had by Laura DuBois, age 36. It was documented at the American Dream Institute for Dreams (ADID) in Washington D.C. on Monday, March 25, 2019. Here, Ms. DuBois explains her dream to ADID researchers.
Just three days after the release of the Mueller Report, with impeachment proceedings occurring at an insanely rapid pace, Trump had a massive heart attack on Air Force One while flying to Mar-a-Lago. The next day, while in the ICU at some janky Florida hospital where abandoned pet boa constrictors were the orderlies, he had another massive heart attack and died. That means no more Tweets from Donald Trump!
![I Believe… [Channeling Gump]](https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/579fa3912994ca0eff850271/1544635278364-21X4GHT9KZ4EYXBTBIRR/ibelieve....jpg)
I Believe… [Channeling Gump]
…that, in the spirit of Forrest Gump, racist is what racist does rather than what racist says.
![I Believe.. [At Least He's Number One in Scandals]](https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/579fa3912994ca0eff850271/1544276106490-LLETZIIZTIC2WWTANN73/IMG_0302.jpeg)
I Believe.. [At Least He's Number One in Scandals]
…that this Mueller investigation has patiently and methodically put together nothing short of the most corrupt and systematic presidential scandal in history.
American Shithole #37 | The Redaction Game and a Farewell to a Softer, Kinder Dildo
So yeah, not quite the sendoff I gave that miserable fuck from Arizona, but it is technically the holiday season, and in the spirit of giving, I guess I’ll just leave it at that.
American Shithole #36 | The Waiting Game
I just want to know the truth.
“I’ve been sitting in the waiting room forever, doc, give it to me straight — how bad is my country?”
“I’m afraid you have late-stage four Klepto-Capitalism; it’s malignant, and left untreated, it’s terminal.”
“Any good news, doc?”
“Not really.”
How Progress Wins: Recalling the Bedrock Narrative
Optimism is the belief that all problems are solvable.
American Shithole #19 — 500 Days of Bummer
Healthier people are unfortunately happier people; and happy people don’t fear the bogeyman. For obscene wealth inequality to work, billionaires need lots of bogeymen — and of course, lots of terrified poor people.
Remember Watergate, or Else
So history is repeating itself here. In the early 1970s, we had a president pulling a Brock Turner on the Constitution, and today we, allegedly and potentially, are witnessing the same thing happen.
Anxiety is the thing that’s ripped our country apart. It has divided us, caused us to fear and hate those who think and live differently than us, and even caused us to hate those who only slightly disagree with us. It has led to panic and overreaction. And I worry that American Anxiety is only going to exacerbate the social and political divide in this country to the point that there is no coming back.