Down Deep
Go down deep, to where it doesn't make sense, that place that no one else can see or understand, and you can't explain or tell them about it while you're there.
![I Believe… [We're Only Human]](https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/579fa3912994ca0eff850271/1552541951057-GLF1DAOQEN76AJ2JJ6MK/ibelieve....jpg)
I Believe… [We're Only Human]
…that there is nothing wrong with capitalism and the only thing wrong with any system of economic structure (communism, socialism, etc.) is that people in power always want more. Even (most) wonderful people with grand altruistic hopes become greedy monsters when afforded power.
A List of Things Americans Do that Get their Soldiers Killed
If you truly want to thank a soldier for their service, you can do it by changing your ways.
Noble X — Episode 22: Please Take Me Home
The mixture of things that seem like a healthy everyday John and manic Johnny 5 is making Thomas’ head spin. Thomas keeps thinking “John needs to go to the hospital to talk with some professionals," and in the same moment, “He seems kind of ok. Is the hospital really necessary?” Thoughts of doubt dance through his head as he drives John to his parents.
The Most Epic St. Paddy's I've Ever Had
Everyone is Irish on St. Paddy’s, but I drank more like a Russian that night. We sat in a circle and took shots of vodka like it was the only liquid in the world that could sustain us. I lined up nine shots and put them away professionally. I was ready to enjoy my life and I knew booze would get me there. But sitting around with nine shots of petroleum disguised as vodka, I was disappointed in my lack of buzz and made my way downstairs for a smoke.
Notes from the Post-it Wall | Week of March 10, 2019
• Being a white male without student loans is not Bad Privilege. Having your parents bribe your way onto a collegiate rowing team is Bad Privilege.
• Speaking of… Lori Loughlin surrendering to the FBI would make a great plot point of a Lori Loughlin Hallmark Channel made-for-TV movie.
My Mom Told Me Not to Get Naked on Television
I've been arrested twice in my life. Both times were for public nudity.
So, when one of the pieces of advice my mother gave me as I packed up my truck to move to...somewhere...after college was "Don't get naked on television. Keep your clothes on!" it made perfect sense.
American Shithole #51 | Venezuela and the White Paper
When I look at the photographs pouring in from Caracas — images of a society teetering on the edge of collapse — I can’t help but think “this is all of us, in ten years; and there’s not a fucking thing we can do about it.”
Our Weekend with Michael Jackson and R. Kelly
Katie came with a record player. I had planned on buying one for myself just about the time we got serious, so when we moved in together, hers became mine, and I was Don Hall-excited about it. I could finally dust off my vinyl collection and give the old discs a spin. The first one I chose was my original pressing of Michael Jackson’s Thriller. At about the third track, the Paul McCartney duet “The Girl is Mine,” Katie asked, “Who is this?”
“Who is this!?” I responded, astounded and slightly confused. “It’s Michael Jackson. It’s Thriller — the second best-selling album of all time.”
“Oh, I don’t like Michael Jackson.”
I immediately questioned our entire relationship and my taste in women. “What!? How can you not like Michael Jackson?
The Minutes of Our Last Meeting | Harvard Alumni Relations Board Emergency Meeting
Even if someone did cheat, they still had to go to class and pay someone do the work.
Drowning in Sorrow but Doggy-paddling My Way Back to You
Apt metaphor
underwater
drowning in despair
movement difficult
slow motion from the get-go
tangled feet
depressed brain
muffled moans of pain
pawing at the tide
The Best Goddamn Salad You’ve Ever Eaten or Go Hungry
Gang, while a cliché, it is so true that life is relatively short. When, at fifty-three, I can see how fragile things are, how quickly the wakening up to the world is snuffed out on a continual basis, I comprehend a simple truth: if you can’t muster a white hot passion for the people and the world around you, that short life is a prison. I’m not a big fan of prison, so I prefer to Carpé that fucking Diem and eat the ass out of life.
![I Believe… [90% of Republicans Approve of The Trump, We Might Want to Re-strategize This Deal]](https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/579fa3912994ca0eff850271/1551992445718-JLITWT4TDTAP0TCZ4CJ4/ibelieve....jpg)
I Believe… [90% of Republicans Approve of The Trump, We Might Want to Re-strategize This Deal]
…that if 90 percent of Republicans approve of Donald’s “work” as president in February 2019, we’re doing a piss-poor job persuading them otherwise.
Hung Up on a Guy; Mad at My Friends; Drinking in a Loud, Crowded Bar
big deal crazy
live or die
sick movement time
foot in front of foot
things miss things remember
Skip Taylor and The Devil Dog
Sometimes it was downright eerie looking at that dog. He was still Cyrus - all muscle and grin - but he was MORE than.
Book Club Made Me Read It: Carrie
Male writers please take note, you really do not need to describe the shape and relative perkiness of the breasts of every woman who appears in your book. In fact, in most cases you need to describe the breasts of none of the women who appear in your book. I have no recollection of what color hair most of these women were supposed to have, but I can tell you they’ve pretty much all got perky tits.
Notes from the Post-it Wall | Week of March 3, 2019
Few things are funnier than a hysterical person. The R. Kelly interview on CBS This Morning was the best standup comedy I’ve seen since watching Nanette.
American Shithole #50 | Kirstjen Nielsen: Deadeyes Over Dead Kids
“They’ve come all this way, thousands of miles across hostile territory, and we’ve raped them, and murdered them,” I thought.
“And this fucking cunt came to congress to rustle some fucking papers, and fumble some fucking answers.” I seethed.
I am fucking livid — and thankfully I’m not the only one.
The Faux Power That Comes With a Video Camera in Your Pocket
If there is a Murphy’s Law sort of thing for new technologies, it probably goes something like “For every good a new technology can do, there will be five assholes who use it badly.”
The Minutes of The Minutes of Our Last Meeting Staff Meeting
Mercury is in retrograde. Does that affect brains?
...that intense and deep aren’t the same thing even if you’ve convinced yourself they are. Intense is momentary and fleeting; deep is the result of time and energy.